Pigs

Middle Eastern countries have clearly always had a bit of a thing about pigs. One of the first pamphlets I was offered when I toured the Mosque was a curious piece of propaganda titled ‘Why Muslims reject pork”. It has a number of unlikely words of wisdom such as the fact that virtually every disease in the world stems from them and even Westerners dislike pig meat.
Anyway, all this swine flu nonsense is as manna from heaven you could say. The fact that poorly pig is unable to communicate his snivel once dead let alone roast, boiled or fried appears to be of no consequence. The Egyptians have elected to cull around quarter of a million pigs in one go though strangely a lot of these animals appear to be living amongst the poor of the country which is both odd and clearly bad. Bahrain has banned the import of all pig meat in an effort defend the kingdom. This has been a running debate in the Bahrain parliament for some time, along with banning alcohol, bringing in a Gulf wide currency and generally cutting off their noses to spite themselves. The only potential growth industry here is the import of residents and tourists along with expat financial business – why else build all these tower blocks of offices and accommodation? And making the place more Arab and less Western is not the way ahead.

Our local supermarket, the very satisfactory Al Jezeera, has worked out what it needs to sell. Consequently it has a non-Muslim section where you can get bacon pork and bacon/pork flavoured things like crisps, pizzas and filled pasta. Unsurprisingly it is very popular and has a steady flow of western types looking for the more normal lines of food. Hopefully supplies will not be expended before this rather draconian and unproductive move has been finished.

Now, must go and fix myself a bacon butty….

The Bahrain National Museum

I went here a week or so ago but didn't get round to putting a video together until now. It was quite interesting though I was hoping to see more stuff than there was inside. I may go back as I believe there is a special exhibition of gold and swords on this week which is the sort of thing I imagined would be there all the time. The building itself is very smart both on the outside and inside - have a look at the video and you will see what I mean.

Visit to the Mosque

As I have the biggest mosque in Bahrain visible out of my hotel window and I do not believe I have ever before been in to one it seemed a good idea to do a visit during one of my days off. The whole place is very tourist friendly and they were more than happy to answer questions and let you go wherever you wished. I have already posted some pictures on Facebook and so here is a short video of my visit.

Spring Cleaning

It is clear from a casual observation of life in Bahrain that for the average fellow cleanliness is next to godliness – well, this would appear to be true for objects if not people!

Within the hotel area there are a veritable army of people, all Pakistani of course, who are dedicated to cleaning things. The room services team hunt in packs of at least 3 and spend about 40minutes in the room frequently cleaning things that are already clean. Like the inside of draws and cabinets that are unused, toilets which have remained left in splendid isolation since I moved in (the apartment has 3 loos and only two occasional occupants!); even the bears got thoroughly dusted the other day judging from their rearranged positions on my return the other day.

However, all this pales into insignificance when you see chaps standing in the man-made waterfall and ponds, carefully avoiding treading on the massive goldfish, scrubbing away for fear that some algae may form and disfigure the water feature. Outside in the car park I regularly see two fellows working their way around the edge scrubbing the kerb stones – provides some inspiration that my job isn’t so bad after all.

Outside the hotel you frequently see platoons of yellow overalled fellows picking litter off the beach and sea defence walls or taking their life in their hands standing in the road to sweep it – an endless task given an area predisposed to much sand and wind but it keeps people busy. Car cleaning is another industry. I have my personal car cleaner, an ancient Indian chap called Feisal who asks me on an almost daily basis whether I need my car cleaned and is delighted on the highly rare occasions (normally at the stage when I can’t see out of the windows!) that I agree to let him wash it by hand for about 2Bd.

Once in a Lifetime

Well, one month done. Just five to go. Ha! I was thinking of writing some sort of stocktake - how I feel at the moment, but thought it might be a bit depressing to read and then decided it needs to be recorded. There is no point being miserable but equally there is no point denying the truth of the situation.

At the risk of paraphrasing the Talking Heads; so, where did my family, my daughters and my friends go? What happened to my nice car and motorbikes? Where is my pleasant house and familiar surroundings? Oh, I remember, I left them all back in the UK.

And why is my brain beginning to shrink? Why does no one ever ask my opinion or give me a job which is more complex than moving bits of Powerpoint slides around? Why can’t I eat real food or wear normal clothes? Why do I get up at 5.30am one day or have to sleep through the daylight the next day? Why do I spend 12hrs a day in a windowless office watching chat-rooms and answering the telephone? Oh, I remember, that’s because I have been ‘selected’ for this important role; no one else could do it, obviously.

Will I ever be asked, while I am here, to present information which the audience do not already know or be employed in some way which approaches even a quarter of the value or output of the job I enjoyed and have been taken from in the UK? Will I get a day off with other people to talk to or be permitted more than two meals a week which are not eaten alone? I suspect not.

When all is said and done, do I care? No, not really. I don’t care I’m here, I don’t care that much for what I am doing and I don’t even really care I cannot go home for ages. There is no point caring. It is a case of enduring until it is over. And when it is over, it is definitely - over.

Bahrain Highway Code

The Bahrain Highway Code

1. At any junction 1 in 4 cars must do a U-Turn.
2. Only Western drivers need to use indicators.
3. Local drivers will generally be in the wrong lane for where they are going.
3a. It is perfectly acceptable to turn right from the left hand lane on a 3carriageway road - and vice versa.
4. Bicycles must not be lit, can only travel in the opposite direction to the traffic on the carriageway they use, unless using the pavement.
5. Local women drivers are exempt from the need to park their car in a marked parking space, even assuming the vehicle is small enough to fit in to just one space in the first place.
6. Never, ever let anyone out into your lane or offer any acknowledgement if anyone should be foolish enough to let you into their lane.
6a. As a consequence of 6 it is expected that cars emerging into a lane will do so even if this space is too small and hence the car that is already on the main carriageway must brake hard and swerve into the spare lane - even if it isn't free.
7. Cement lorries can go whereever they like.
8. Taking driving lessons is a sign of weakness and taking a driving test is just foolish; after all if you crash it is evidently the 'Will of Allah'.
8a. You will be reminded of 8 by the fact that you will see a fairly major and avoidable road traffic accident almost every other day.
9. Don't even think of riding a motorbike unless it is after dark and maitains an average speed in excess of 100mph. Unless it is a pizza delivery moped in which case it assumes the rights of a Cement Lorry (see Rule 7) but with less sustained success.
10. Traffic Lights are only advisory.