Once in a Lifetime

Well, one month done. Just five to go. Ha! I was thinking of writing some sort of stocktake - how I feel at the moment, but thought it might be a bit depressing to read and then decided it needs to be recorded. There is no point being miserable but equally there is no point denying the truth of the situation.

At the risk of paraphrasing the Talking Heads; so, where did my family, my daughters and my friends go? What happened to my nice car and motorbikes? Where is my pleasant house and familiar surroundings? Oh, I remember, I left them all back in the UK.

And why is my brain beginning to shrink? Why does no one ever ask my opinion or give me a job which is more complex than moving bits of Powerpoint slides around? Why can’t I eat real food or wear normal clothes? Why do I get up at 5.30am one day or have to sleep through the daylight the next day? Why do I spend 12hrs a day in a windowless office watching chat-rooms and answering the telephone? Oh, I remember, that’s because I have been ‘selected’ for this important role; no one else could do it, obviously.

Will I ever be asked, while I am here, to present information which the audience do not already know or be employed in some way which approaches even a quarter of the value or output of the job I enjoyed and have been taken from in the UK? Will I get a day off with other people to talk to or be permitted more than two meals a week which are not eaten alone? I suspect not.

When all is said and done, do I care? No, not really. I don’t care I’m here, I don’t care that much for what I am doing and I don’t even really care I cannot go home for ages. There is no point caring. It is a case of enduring until it is over. And when it is over, it is definitely - over.